July 30, 2004/Av 5 5764, Vol. 56, No. 45
Learning in a 'world that isn't just Jewish'
SARAH DELANEY
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 Meghan Meyerson, center, reads from the Torah at her bat mitzvah in 1999, one of the moments that has solidified her faith. Her parents, Mary Ellen Simonson and Bruce Meyerson, look on. Photo courtesy of Meghan Meyerson |
But unlike some other Jewish teenagers, Leshner didn't attend a Jewish school. And the religious classes he took were not just about Judaism. They were required by his Catholic high school.
Leshner is a recent graduate from Brophy College Preparatory in Phoenix.
He's not alone. There are a number of Jewish students who go to secular and even Christian schools.
What does this difference in beliefs mean for the student? What happens if a student is unlike the rest of his classmates and how does it affect his or her Jewish identity?
For some students, the fact that they are part of the minority because of their faith is not an issue and they feel that their experiences in a more diverse setting are positive.
"I think I am probably better able to deal with living in ... a world that isn't just Jewish," says Abby Zeitlin, who just graduated from Arcadia High School in Scottsdale. "I can maintain my faith and maintain what I believe in while living in a pretty non-Jewish environment."
Howard Epstein, whose two children attend All Saints' Episcopal Day School in Phoenix, says he feels that his children "are very assimilated and well adjusted to what's really out there."
Jews make up a small percentage of the country's population and the percentage is similar at All Saints', he says. "The kids were able to get a different perspective, and I don't regret the decision."
A main concern of both parents and children is the challenge of how to maintain a child's faith when confronted with very different outside forces.
For some, it is a struggle.
"I found over the last four years of high school that I definitely have waned in my faith, and how much I'm into following Judaism," Zeitlin says. "I guess part of it is because I'm not really surrounded by Jews that much."
For others, upholding their beliefs is no battle at all.
"I really didn't find it difficult," says Meghan Meyerson, a recent graduate of Xavier College Preparatory, a Catholic high school. "People didn't try to persuade me to convert or anything. ... I never really had any problems; I didn't feel like I didn't belong."
Some might fear that the lack of daily Jewish education would leave these students less inclined to continue in their faith. Many of these students, however, actually make an extra effort to maintain their Jewish identity.
Attending Shabbat and High Holiday services is one example. And just like children who attend Jewish schools, their bar or bat mitzvah is an important milestone of their childhood.
"I have to say the best part of being Jewish ... was my bat mitzvah, definitely," says Meyerson. "It was just great, after four years of practicing Hebrew, to stand in front of the congregation and recite it. ... Of all the things - services, family gatherings - that's really the best one."
Participation in other outside Jewish activities helps many stay connected to their faith.
"I'm actually really involved in BBYO (B'nai B'rith Youth Organization)," says Ariel Cooper, a junior at Gilbert High School. "It's my youth group, and I meet with them a couple of times a week and we just do so many things. I love it, it's great."
This interaction with other Jewish teens is something important to both students and youth leaders.
"I had a really good experience at Hebrew High (Phoenix High School of Jewish Studies)," says Zeitlin. "When you're surrounded by people where you automatically share something in common, it's really easy to make friends. You already have this bond."
Myra Shindler, principal of Phoenix High School of Jewish Studies, has a similar reaction.
"(The teens) come ... to continue their Jewish education and to continue to identify Jewishly with other Jewish teens," she says. "That contact with the other Jewish teens socially is important to both kids who attend Jewish day high school and the kids who attend public (or non-Jewish) school."
In addition to focusing on their own Jewish education, many of the students speak about their faith to their non-Jewish classmates.
Leshner says the religious classes he had to take at Brophy "were always open for debate ... I found that debating with the Christian kids about issues was helpful."
Parents also get involved in the process.
Chris Epstein gives presentations at All Saints' along with her husband Howard. "We'd do mock seders and have Hanukkah presentations or parties every year," she says. "We did presentations for every holiday."
She says they also brought in rabbis to speak to the whole school and served traditional holiday foods to the students.
"We were able to share our traditions and our faith with the school," says Epstein. "They were always open and whole-heartedly welcomed us."
Jasmine Olson, an eighth-grader at Rhodes Junior High in Mesa and daughter of Jewish News Staff Writer Beth Olson, says, "A lot of times at school the teachers have me do presentations (about Judaism and Israel). ... A lot of kids are interested."
Some hesitantly mention unpleasant incidents, but quickly add that they were small pieces of a much larger, more pleasant experience.
"We've had some December dilemmas with my youngest (son)," says Lori Fries, a parent of three sons at public schools. "He was supposed to be graded on a letter to Santa Claus. ... But we talked to the teacher about it. And my oldest (son's) birthday is in December, so when he was in elementary school, when they put all the birthdays up, his was on a little Santa. ... So those kind of little things along the way. (But still) I think we've been really lucky."
In the end, nearly everyone - parents and students - felt the experiences at non-Jewish schools were beneficial. "(My kids helped) personalize Judaism," says Epstein. "Many of the kids don't have a whole lot of exposure to our faith, so I think that Ben and Rachel helped put a face to Judaism and helped kids understand more about the faith."
Ultimately, the situation is different for each family.
"I just think it's best for people to decide what's good for themselves," says Cooper. "Someone (may do) really well at a Jewish school; maybe someone else wouldn't necessarily do as well or enjoy it as much.
"It's just what people feel comfortable with."
Sarah Delaney is a graduate of Xavier College Preparatory and a high school classmate of Meghan Meyerson. Contact the writer at sarah_delaney@jewishaz.com.