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January 2, 2004/Tevet 8 5764, Vol. 56, No. 15
Leave those kids at home
BETH OLSON
Staff Writer
Toddlers do not belong in bridal boutiques.
I know that most people know this, but for those of you who don't, it's true. Not even if you have the cutest, most well-behaved toddler on the planet.
My cousin (who happens to be Jewish News Staff Writer Jessica Barber) is getting married in October, so Jessica and I, along with her mother and three other members of the bridal party, went to try on dresses for the upcoming nuptials. All was going well until a family brought a toddler into the boutique. The little boy was really adorable, but normal. That means he was running, climbing and giggling throughout their stay. I do not in any way believe that his behavior was inappropriate - for the playground. But amidst hundreds of thousands of dollars in bridal gowns and patrons who had carefully scheduled appointments to prepare for the most important day of their life, this little boy had no place.
What was most inappro-priate was his mother's behavior. She should have left him with someone else or rescheduled her appoint-ment for a time when she could. It was particularly frustrating because I found a sitter for my 6-year-old, who happens to be a member of the bridal party, because I knew that our visit would even be too long for her.
Toddlers, and some babies and preschoolers, don't belong in restaurants either. Unless, of course, there is a member of your party who is willing to step outside with a child who becomes restless, rambunc-tious or upset.
There is nothing worse than spending the time, energy and money to get a babysitter for your own kids, only to be seated next to a family with rowdy young children at a restaurant. As a parent, I can be tolerant for the few minutes it takes to actually remove the child, but anything beyond that really tries my patience.
Shopping brings up other issues. As a mother, I know that parents need to take their children shopping with them on occasion. However, when my kids were young, I rarely took them to the grocery store - I'd plan my weekly shopping trip for a time when my husband was home. Some parents may disagree with my strategy, believing that children need to be taught how to behave at the grocery store. But I think that parents who take their young children shopping are not only being unfair to other patrons, but they're being unfair to their child. Children need to learn how to behave, but not before it is developmentally ap-propriate - and to ask them to sit quietly for long periods of time is unreasonable.
And don't get me wrong. When I see a mother alone at the store with children (especially noisy ones) in tow, I do have sympathy. I've been there. And surely there are single parents, or people whose situations make it necessary for them to take the children shopping, but if parents would take the time to even consider leaving the children at home, everyone would be happier - the parents, the children and certainly the other customers.
When I see a crying toddler in a shopping cart pushed along by two parents, I find myself wondering why one of the parents didn't just stay home. I'm equally surprised when I run to Target after my own kids are in bed - on a school night - to find children being pulled along by their parents long after they should have been asleep.
So parents, before you drag your young children around to grocery stores, restaurants, and bridal boutiques, please take a minute to think if there may be a more satisfying option for everyone.
Contact the writer at beth_olson@jewishaz.com.
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