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June 20, 2003/Sivan 20 5763, Vol. 55, No. 43
The joy of Jewish expression in art
ALISA SLOAN
Special Sections Editor
A friend of artist Payton Cooper's asked her if she would be willing to paint on stage during a recent musical performance at Beth El Congregation.
Cooper accepted.
"The idea was for Marc Philippe, who is the cantor at Beth El ... to do a celebration of the arts where there were singers, and a choir and a singer/songwriter (performed)," explains Cooper.
"And then he wanted to have someone painting in the moment - and that would be me."
At the event, called "A Celebration of the Arts," there was also a photographer who took photos of the congregation and presented a slideshow as the final piece of the performance.
For Cooper, the experience presented a creative opportunity as well as a personal challenge.
"My mind starts whirling and I come up with all these ideas and so on, and I just let it swirl and flow around," she says. "I didn't want to have anything really concrete because I wanted to be able to create in the moment.
"The challenging part was to get out of my head," she relates. "To not focus on what I was about to do" - paint in front of an audience.
One of the most powerful aspects of the experience for Cooper was being on the bimah while the music was being performed.
"Standing next to the ark, and being able to create. This is what I came here to do ... to create," she says.
Though it wasn't the spiritual experience she had anticipated, Cooper found that its familiarity made it just as significant.
"What I discovered was that it was exactly the same feeling and the same flow as when I'm in the studio painting by myself," says Cooper. "That was surprising to me, because ... I was hoping for this huge mystical, wonderful, 'ooh-la-la' experience. And what I found out is that it wasn't any different than what I normally do. And that, to me, that was cool."
Cooper says the painting evolved for her simply by listening to the music. She started with a sponge because she "sensed a swooshing feel of color" - cobalt blue. Then she used her fingers and brushes and even rags to complement what she was hearing and how she was feeling.
She was "in the moment," she says, and finds that now it's difficult to put into words exactly what she was thinking at the time.
"It's kind of hard to explain because it's not a thought process, it's like you get out of your head, and you just are in the moment, and you go with what flows through," says Cooper.
"That's the creative process - it's to be totally in the moment and focused on the thoughts, but sometimes it's not a thought - it's a feeling, it's an impression."
After the performance, she donated the painting to a silent auction, so it went up for bid. "The person who purchased it was thrilled and her joy of owning it just increased my joy at creating it," notes Cooper.
While painting, she says she didn't notice the audience, "which was a good thing."
"I have this inner critic, like we all do, and if I start thinking about what people might be thinking about what I'm doing, it totally kills the creative process," says Cooper. "And that's true whether I'm painting in front of an audience or if I'm painting by myself, or if I'm on the computer designing a logo or a brochure for a client."
Cooper is also a graphic designer, and has a Scottsdale-based business, studio-Magic. Though painting in front of people was unique to that night, listening to Jewish music while working is not. She often listens to it while she works, and her favorite performer is Michael Shapiro, who is also the scholar-in-residence at the Scottsdale Torah Institute.
Cooper has been exploring Judaism for the last five years at Ruach Hamidbar. As a child, she was raised Reform, but only felt a connection to Judaism when listening to Hebrew prayers being recited.
"When I would sit in services, like at the High Holy Days, I'd have tears streaming down my face when the Hebrew prayers were being chanted," Cooper remembers. "I thought, 'What's going on here?' because I didn't understand the Hebrew, but I loved the sounds of the Hebrew prayers."
Through her recent synagogue affiliation, she says, "I learned to pray in a totally different way than what I was raised in. I began to really open up to my Jewish roots, and that was a real gift."
Cooper has also discovered Kaballah, and is pursuing a project where she meditates on a Hebrew letter and, with a stencil of it, fills in the empty spaces with color and imagery that represent aspects of that particular letter.
"It's really getting into the mystical aspect of all of this that really drew me," says Cooper. "I began to resonate with it very strongly, and I started to read books like 'The Wisdom of the Jewish Alphabet' and 'Book of Letters.' "
Her interest in Kaballah has led her to study Hebrew, which, she says, "has been an incredible joy."
"I'm learning to read it, and I'm learning to understand it, and as I begin to say the prayers in Hebrew ... the whole thing is shifting for me," she explains. "I'm just finding a deeper resonance with Judaism than I ever had in my entire life, and it's amazing to me that this is happening and I love every second of it. My soul is glowing."
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