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December 22, 2000/Kislev 25, 5761, Vol. 53, No.13
Letters to the EditorDecember 22, 2000
If love trumps religion, teach, don't turn awayEditor:I read with serious interest the two articles by Gary Rosenblatt and Rabbi Jerome Epstein on Jewish intermarriage (Jewish News, Dec. 1). Rosenblatt, a popular Jewish columnist, was shocked to learn that 56 percent of the respondents in a recent American Jewish Committee survey would "not be pained" if their child married a gentile. He was equally taken aback at learning that a "large majority of those surveyed favored rabbinic officiation at such marriages, even if a Christian cleric is involved in the ceremony." It may be presumptuous, but not unfair, to ask Rosenblatt where he has been for the past 15 years. As early as 1988, the Jewish interfaith marriage rate among reform Jews was 62 percent; for Conservative Jews, 50 percent; and among Orthodox, 25 percent. It was also apparent 12 years ago that the failure of rabbis to officiate at interfaith marriages was chasing Jewish spouses away from Judaism and further was giving up the possibility of a conversion of non-Jewish spouses. Epstein argues that the synagogue may be poised to disseminate the message of marrying within the faith. He concludes that we must either accept the survey data and change our own value systems, thereby signaling our surrender, or we must make a renewed effort to strengthen Jewish identity. Epstein's solution of better education for teenagers and young adults among Conservative Jews is the same thing he suggested 12 years ago, only this time Conservative Judaism is going to allocate $250,000 to solve a nationwide problem. It's trying to tame a raging bull with a fly swatter. Moreover, when 50 percent of young adult Jews have already intermarried, we need to think about solutions "outside of the box" because traditional suggestions are simply not working. One partial solution is for rabbis to officiate at interfaith marriages. The act should not be considered a surrender of Jewish values any more that when one of our children marries within the faith to a Jewish mate who is ignorant of Jewish culture, Jewish history and Jewish religious values. Rabbis don't turn their back on the latter, but all Orthodox, Conservative and 50 percent of Reform rabbis refuse to officiate when a gentile is the fiancé. Should Rosenblatt's and Epstein's solution of better education be correct, it would be both logical and wise to welcome interfaith couples into our Jewish world, beginning with the marriage ceremony itself. Love often trumps religion, and although it may be hard to believe, it has nothing to do with the success or failure of Jewish education. Most urban Jewish communities, including ours, have a wealth of highly capable Jewish education scholars and teachers. It would be appropriate and would make good sense to fill our Jewish education classes with intermarried couples taught by rabbis who married them and who now teach them the beauty of our culture, the strength of our history, the importance of our religious values and what it means to become an integral member of our Jewish community. Judaism has an amazing past and a tremendous future, but our religious leaders must take off their blinders and recognize that we are failing to market the product God gave us to disseminate. David R. Frazer Phoenix What's the draw?Editor:I read with interest the story about the new Jewish Community Campus (Jewish News, Nov. 17). The list of services which will be available is extensive, to say the least, and yet, as I review them, I see no reason to ever go there. Oh yes, I am curious as to how it will look, but there won't be anything of interest, really, which would make the 30-to 45-minute trip worth it for me. Perhaps before the task force receives final approval for the building design and makes final architectural drawings, they should ask the Jewish community whether or not they would like to see a theater included in the design. Such a facility would house quality performances such as those put on by the Arizona Jewish Theatre company, concerts by the Israeli Scouts and other attractive productions. Quite frankly, that would be the only draw for a lot of people living in north central Phoenix who would not have use for the preschool, sports facilities, or the other wonderful amenities now planned. Ruth A. Poles Phoenix Torah elevates womenEditor:Orthodox Judaism has a very positive attitude towards women, despite the mistaken impression described in the article "A minyan opinion" (Jewish News, Dec. 1). Orthodox Judaism encourages cooperation between husband and wife in all aspects of life. Yes, the wife is the "responsible party" for raising the children and the husband for breadwinning; but if they agree to share these responsibilities, that is also permissible. Adam and Eve were not "cursed" with permanent hardships. Like a parent, God gave them educational penalties that addressed the cause of their sin. A little insight into the Torah, rather than a superficial reading, shows how their efforts to overcome these difficulties would enable Adam and Eve to reach a higher level of self-control and cooperation. Women in the Torah are not "subservient." God told Abraham that he must do exactly what his wife Sarah told him to do. Rebecca overrode her husband Isaac's error and chose Jacob as the ancestor of the Jewish people. The Talmud tells us that the Jews were redeemed from Egypt only because of the actions of virtuous women. And the rest of Biblical history is full of more examples of influential women who guided the course of Jewish history. It is unfortunate that non-Orthodox Jews can sometimes get mistaken impressions about this matter. Leah Sapir, President Agudat Achim Congregation Phoenix Editor: I would like to commend Marty Latz on his frank, open column (Jewish News, Dec. 1). The more we are willing to overcome our initial hesitations, the more we will connect as a nation and as a community. Our strength is commensurate to our connection and pride in our Torah heritage. I would like to clarify that the Torah does not prescribe subservience for women. On the contrary, the Talmud says a man must love his wife as much as he loves himself, and he must honor her even more than he honors himself. Thank you for a refreshing column. Rabbi Zvi Holland Director Phoenix Community Kollel Let's display our symbolsEditor:I just finished reading the article about interfaith families having trees decorated for the holiday in their homes ("Symbols Talk," Jewish News, Dec. 15). Any family, Jewish or otherwise, would benefit by reading Patricia Polacco's "The Trees of the Dancing Goats." Polacco, an author of several books, many with Jewish characters, helps bridge a gap from which all of us could learn. This is our family's first year in Arizona, and we spontaneously decided to hang blue-and-white lights on a portion of our home. Our new home without snow looked a little barren. We also plan to proudly display our menorah in our front window. Happy Hanukkah and peace for those who continue to struggle with their identities. Elana Weisberg Cave Creek Via the Internet Right on, Dr. LauraEditor:Surfing the Young Israel Web site, I noticed that Dr. Laura Schlessinger was the guest of honor at a luncheon, where she was given a standing ovation by 100 rabbis and lay leaders. I find it quite interesting to compare this reception to opinion pieces published in Jewish News attacking Dr. Laura (Aug. 4 and Sept. 15). Charles Meyerson Via the Internet |
