|
June 2, 2000/28 Iyar 5760, Vol. 52, No.39
Leap of faithFollowing exploration and learning, Judaism welcomes new adherents
VICKI CABOT
|
| Orpah kissed her mother-in-law farewell. But Ruth clung to her.... 'Do not urge me to leave you, to turn back and not follow you. For wherever you go, I will go; wherever you lodge, I will lodge; your people shall be my people, your God, my God.' " Ruth 1:14-1:17 |
 Craig Dean says Rabbi Rick Sherwin's acceptance made him feel welcome at Beth El long before he made the decision to convert. Here, Sherwin, right, helps Dean return his yad, Torah pointer, to its case after practicing for his June 3 bar mitzvah. The pointer was a gift from Sherwin and his wife, Elissa. Photo by Vicki Cabot |
It tells of Naomi's return to her native Israel from Moab after the untimely deaths of her husband and two married sons. Her daughters-in-law, Orpah and Ruth, begin the arduous trip with her. Orpah ultimately heeds Ruth's entreaties and returns to her family in Moab; Ruth stubbornly elects to continue on with Naomi.
Ruth's journey, the quintessential story of the Jewish convert, represents the vast physical and spiritual terrain traversed by those who choose to become Jews. It epitomizes the driving inner imperative to become a part of the Jewish people.
"We read the book of Ruth on Shavuot because (Shavuot) marks our entry into the covenant with God," explains Rabbi Chaim Silver of Young Israel. Shavuot celebrates the giving of the Torah on Mt. Sinai, the seminal event of Jewish identity. Just as Ruth follows Naomi - "clings to her," the narrative relates - so those at Sinai commit to follow Torah and become Jews.
"We are a nation of converts," says Silver of those at Sinai.
So how does this "nation of converts," which today conveys Jewish identity through birth far more often than through choice, welcome those not born into the fold?
Judiciously, yet openly, say recent converts. With care and concern, and a growing sensitivity to their particular needs, they agree.
Locally, congregational rabbis report a steady stream of potential "new Jews" who call, e-mail and knock at their doors. Some are looking for answers, others spiritual fulfillment, still others direction and purpose. Some are itinerant seekers; some are genuinely drawn to Jewish life.
Fewer come seeking "conversions of convenience" to placate a prospective Jewish spouse or in-laws. More are sincere in their desire to explore what Judaism has to offer, then decide if that is truly where they belong.
If openness to the convert is innately Jewish, so is an initial resistance to the initial overture, as evidenced by Naomi's directive to Ruth "to turn back."
Ginny Keller, 52, recalls Rabbi Bill Berk of Temple Chai initially turning her away when she brought up the subject of conversion. Keller, whose husband is Jewish and whose two sons are being raised as Jews, tells of approaching Berk when she first considered conversion.
Berk suggested that Keller, who was raised as a Catholic in New York, speak to a priest about her religious doubts.
A year later, says Keller, she returned. "I told him, 'Don't turn me away again.' "
She began one-on-one study with the rabbi, and later enrolled in the temple's introduction to Judaism class. She became a Jew six years ago and continues to study in the temple's advanced adult education classes.
Silver, of Young Israel, carefully assesses each candidate's seriousness and persistence.
Carol Smith, not her real name, recalls Silver's initial hesitancy when she first broached conversion. The daughter of a Baptist minister, she arrived at Orthodox Judaism after a nearly 20-year spiritual search, exploring many Christian alternatives, studying with a Reform rabbi and taking Jewish studies classes at Arizona State University.
When Silver tried to dissuade her, she was determined.
"I looked him straight in the eye and told him, 'I will become a Jew. I already know who I am.' "
Smith, now 50, completed a two-year course of Jewish study and will celebrate Shavuot this year for the first time as a Jew.
"If you are becoming Jewish as an expression of who you are and need to be, (then pursue conversion). If not, don't do it," counsels Rabbi Rick Sherwin of Beth El Congregation.
Although seriousness and desire are determining factors, "There are no (real) prerequisites for conversion other than a willingness," says Rabbi Andrew Straus of Temple Emanuel in Tempe.
Bonnie Glass, who studied for conversion in a joint program taught by Straus and Rabbi Bonnie Koppell of Temple Beth Sholom of Chandler, calls herself a "brand spanking new" Jew.
Raised as a Mormon, Glass, 27, converted to Judaism on April 19 this year.
She says she had been estranged from the Mormon Church and trying to deal with the death of her brother, when she attended services at Temple Emanuel with a friend about two years ago.
Her only previous exposure to Judaism had come from a trip to a concentration camp in Germany as a young child. She says she came away with the understanding that "being Jewish was different."
As an adult, Glass, who says she "never felt right" as a Mormon, was attracted to Judaism's openness.
"(At services) the rabbi was talking about Moses and everybody (in the congregation) got in on the action," she recalls incredulously. "I said, 'Whoa, can you actually disagree with the person talking?'"
Glass embarked on her own search, reading and studying.
"Judaism's (emphasis) on community, personal responsibility and helping others clicked with me," she says.
On Yom Kippur of this year, she called the temple to inquire about conversion.
"It just seemed like the right time for a new start," she says.
Glass describes her husband as "Jewish by default." A non-Jew, he does not identify with any religious faith, but Glass says he has been very supportive of her choice.
Keller, already immersed in Jewish life, says her decision to convert was a natural next step. Craig Dean, 50, also raised Catholic and married to a Jew, describes his decision in much the same way.
"It was time," he says of his conversion.
When he and wife Ellen married in 1978 neither practiced religion. But when daughter Molly was born, they decided to raise her as a Jew, sending her to day school and gradually adding ritual observance to their family life.
"It felt like I had been opening doors," he says of his gradual move toward conversion. "It was just so natural, like a transformation."
When Dean went to Sherwin to discuss conversion, the rabbi challenged him, asking him, "Why would you want to convert?"
Dean says he replied, "Because this is my community."
Sherwin, Dean says, said, "Let's get started."
Craig Dean converted four years ago; he will become a bar mitzvah at Beth El on June 3.
The course and duration of conversion study vary. The joint Temple Emanuel and Temple Beth Sholom program extends over a 20-week period and includes learning about Jewish holidays, life cycle events, history, values, ethics, prayer and theology. At Beth El a similar course runs for about nine months; Young Israel's program, supervised by the Rabbinical Council of California in Los Angeles, extends about two years.
While candidates are expected to acquire a basic knowledge and understanding of Jewish practice and beliefs, the rabbis emphasize the emotional and psychological aspects of conversion as well as its intellectual component.
"This is not just about knowing," says Silver, "it's about a way of life."
Sherwin says that he is more concerned with "depth of heart" than "depth of mind."
Issues relating to personal identity, family and community surface in the process. Some are discussed in class sessions, while others are examined in one-on-one sessions with rabbis.
Glass senses that her father is angry about her decision, even though he has said little.
"It's as if nothing happened," she says of her conversion. But she is confident that her father "loves me enough" to eventually come around.
Her mother, divorced from her father and a practicing Hindu, has reacted very differently.
"She is just thrilled," says Glass. "She sends me everything Jewish she can find."
Her mother-in-law has been supportive, she says, but she senses that it may be difficult for her to accept Jewish grandchildren.
"But she loves me too," says Glass, confident that family issues will work out.
Dean shares a letter written to him by his mother, a practicing Catholic, on the occasion of his conversion.
"We love you for who you are," she wrote.
The Jewish community's acceptance, once a source of unease for many converts and born Jews, appears to have become easier as interfaith marriage and conversion have become more prevalent. The openness of congregations to interfaith families may encourage non-Jewish spouses to explore conversion.
"The shul was very welcoming," says Dean, who was recently elected to the Beth El board of directors. And so was the rabbi. "If he had been indifferent or cold, I would not have continued the process."
Congregations are evaluating policies such as membership and participation in religious services and other activities for non-Jewish family members.
They are also demonstrating heightened sensitivity as they develop formalized structures to ease the transition and welcome converted Jews to their congregations.
"We used to leave converts dripping at the mikvah," says Fonda Christopher, who directs Temple Emanuel's New Beginnings program. "Now we work with them while they are taking classes and continue after they convert."
The New Beginnings class provides an opportunity to discuss personal issues in a supportive group environment. Weekly meetings also familiarize participants with customs and conventions of Jewish life, teach common Yiddish expressions, and include field trips to local Judaica shops and museums, an introduction to Middle Eastern food, and an authentic Shabbat experience.
The program also provides a ready peer group for those new to Judaism.
"It's nice to have someone in the same position as you," says Glass of friends she made through the group.
Anne-Marie Martin, 30, another New Beginnings participant, agrees. "It makes you feel that you're not the only one."
Keller facilitates a similar program at Temple Chai. Like Christopher, she sees conversion as a beginning, not an ending.
"I'm continuing to learn, to grow, to embrace," she says.
Her husband, she says, has followed her lead.
"We have a lot more ritual in our home. We try to keep Shabbat in our own way and are always looking to add more meaning to that day. My children go to day school. We celebrate the holidays. We also are in a study-oriented chavurah (friendship group) and spend a lot of time in Jewish study."
Converts often impact their families in this way.
"Jews by choice bring great gifts to the Jewish community," says Straus. "They are spiritual seekers, they are committed to Jewish life, committed to Jewish education, to openness, to talking. We are enriched by their diversity."
Those who turn to Judaism, and seek to cling to it, bring an "energizing renewal" says Sherwin.
Conversion culminates with formal approval of each candidate by a beit din (rabbinic court), convened by each supervising rabbi or organization; immersion in the mikvah (ritual bath); circumcision or a symbolic ceremony performed on already circumcised males; and a religious ceremony to signal formal acceptance as a Jew.
During the highly emotional events, candidates are asked again if they are sure that they want to be Jews and renounce past religious identity. Immersion in the mikvah symbolically represents rebirth.
"It was powerful," says Keller.
Dipping the prescribed three times in the mikvah's waters, which she likens to amniotic fluid, and reciting the required blessings, Smith says that she felt as she emerged "in every way a Jew."
"It was like a homing process," says Smith, who believes that her soul was at Sinai but in a body of a person who did not then accept the Jewish covenant.
Immersing in the mikvah, she says, she knew "I had made it back."