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Universal acceptance
Group addresses conversion for interfaith couples
 
Eternal Jewish Family, an organization that helps non-Jewish partners or spouses undergo what it describes as a universally accepted conversion to Judaism, plans to hold a seminar on the subject for interfaith couples next month in the Valley.

The seminar will take place May 13-15 at the Arizona Biltmore.

With intermarriage rates skyrocketing, a traditional resistance to converting intermarried spouses is counterproductive, said Rabbi Leib Tropper, who heads Eternal Jewish Family.

"It would be devastating if we ignored them," Tropper said, adding that Maimonides' teachings on the subject almost prophetically address modern issues of intermarriage and conversion.

"According to Jewish law before Maimonides, there was a suggestion in the Talmud not to make conversions for the sake of marriage," Tropper said, "but Maimonides said it's better, without compromising the standards of conversion, to try to get the non-Jewish spouse to convert."

But isn't converting for the sake of marriage considered a bad reason to convert?

"It's not a problem that somebody undertakes study for conversion because they want to get married," said Rabbi David Rebibo, president of the Orthodox Rabbinical Council of Greater Phoenix. However, he added, it's hoped that through study, the non-Jewish partner will learn that the decision is about the religion they are embracing.

"If the conversion is purely 'because I'm married' but there's no commitment to the religion, it's less of a valid reason," he added.

Reform Rabbi Andrew Straus of Temple Emanuel of Tempe agreed, saying, "Reform Judaism says, 'No. We don't want people converting for the sake of marriage, but if Judaism speaks to their hearts, their souls and their brains, our doors are wide open.'"

All of which begs the question of why Eternal Jewish Family is needed.

Rebibo said that the conversion process in America was in a "free fall."

"Reform does what they want, Conservative does what they do, and the result is that all of a sudden we have a serious crisis. Questions arise about how good the conversion is. 'Is this person Jewish?' It's not pleasant and there are no easy answers."

Straus said his Conservative colleagues will accept conversions over which he presided, "but no Orthodox rabbi will," even if his converts meet all the halachic requirements for conversion. These include brit milah (circumcision) or tippat dam (ritual circumcision, for those who have already been medically circumcised) for males, an appearance before a beit din and immersion in a mikvah, he said.

Straus, president of the Board of Rabbis of Greater Phoenix, said he had not heard of Eternal Jewish Family before but added that the emergence of the group marks what he called a "crack in the door" among Orthodox religious officials.

Tropper said the Eternal Jewish Family conversions are Orthodox and halachic, according to Jewish law, and the organization works to ensure that if there are any questions about the conversion they are ironed out.

"It began with a session with the philanthropist Thomas Kap-lan," Tropper said. "We talked about the assimilation issue and some of the problems," including conversions of a spouse being rejected out of hand and some spouses having to undergo conversion two or three times. (The Lillian Jean Kaplan Jewish Pride Through Education Project, named after the philanthropist's mother, sponsors Eternal Jewish Family).

So in September 2005, a rabbinic conference was held in Newark, N.J., where it was decided that the first step to address the problem was to write a manual based on what's acceptable to all rabbis, Tropper said. There have been four rabbinic conferences since then to create awareness of the issues and the standards in the manual in a bid to create consensus, he said.

There are still shades of interpretation, he said. "You'll never get 100 percent consensus, but the shades are all of the same color, not shades of purple, green and yellow."

The problems facing people who find their conversions challenged range from whether they can send their children to a Jewish school, to Jews not wanting to marry their children, to whether they can be called to the bimah in synagogue and more, Tropper said, adding, "It can be complicated."

When a spouse's conversion is not accepted, Rebibo said, "it's destabilizing the marriage and seriously impacting their relationships."

Eternal Jewish Family has "performed a really considerable service to the community at large, to highlight this problem and give it the urgency that it deserves," Rebibo added.

Tropper said that part of the problem was that individual rabbinic courts often would not provide the feedback a person would need to correctly fulfill requirements or would give only a fuzzy picture of the requirements.

"We give people a path to learn to become observant and to do it properly," Tropper said. "We're streamlining the process."

He said the group has involved 11 rabbinic courts (batei din) across the country and in Israel and hopes to have one in Europe soon.

Eternal Jewish Family is based in Tallman, N.Y., and operates under the guidance and halachic rulings of Rabbi Yosef Shalom Elyashev of Jerusalem, a contemporary leading authority on halacha, and Rabbis Dovid Feinstein and Reuven Feinstein, sons of the late Rabbi Moshe Feinstein, a pre-eminent halachic authority.

Although there are no insignificant commandments, Tropper said, the key pillars of conversion are keeping Shabbat, observing kashrut and keeping the laws of family purity.

The Valley was chosen as the site for the May seminar because "we have so many people come from Phoenix to have their conversions done." In addition, Eternal Jewish Family plans to open a local office in the next six months, Tropper said.

Ken and Lucia Schnitzer of Phoenix, one of eight Valley families who have been helped by Eternal Jewish Family, praise the program.

So much so that Lucia will speak on "Becoming Part of a Jewish Community - Firsthand Experience" at the seminar, and Ken sits on the national board of Eternal Jewish Family. They both represent the group in Phoenix and work with intermarried couples seeking conversion here.

"If we ever make aliyah, there isn't going to be any question of my Jewishness," said Lucia. "If my daughter wants to marry a kohen, there isn't going to be any question."

    Details
  • Who: Eternal Jewish Family
  • What: Universally Accepted Conversion in Interfaith Marriage seminar
  • When: May 13-15
  • Where: Arizona Biltmore Resort and Spa, 2400 E. Missouri Ave., Phoenix
  • Cost: Travel and hotel costs are being defrayed through a grant by the Lillian Jean Kaplan Jewish Pride Through Education Project.
  • Contact: (845) 425-3863, info@horizons.edu or eternaljewishfamily.org

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